Character Guide

A "who's who" of Quasispace

Season One

Alair:
Alair was orphaned in a high-tech future and "adopted" by a multi-galactic corporation after her psionic talents started to develop. She's since grown in a rather unusual environment, well-trained for handling board meetings or pursuing criminals with extreme prejudice, but with little in the way of normal contact or relationships. About 5'10, brown hair, green eyes. She's always eager to learn about something she hasn't been exposed to. Her occasional naivety is a rather sensitive issue, however, and she's extremely reluctant to ever come out and admit that she doesn't have the faintest idea what someone's talking about. Put into such a corner she'll bluff her way through as best she can while trying to figure it out. Riffing-wise, she's more likely to be bothered by OOCness than any other sort of inherent wrongness in the 'fic itself. She's also a huge fangirl when it comes to certain 'video game celebrities' (especially Terry Bogard). She enjoys poking holes at authorial logic, munchkinism, making tragic attempts at puns, even worse attempts at hentai riffs, and she's always the sort who stands up and yells at the minor characters to turn around when the knife-wielding maniac is sneaking up behind them. Not really a heel character but may be goaded into action.

black dub:
black dub is a very confused young black male. He's manic-depressive and violent, sometimes. He's usually found in black blue jeans, a white t-shirt and sneakers. Despite this nonassuming look, he's a ninja. Not an overly good one and not an overly bad one. Just average. He gets the job done. Even better, he's got mild costume-changing abilities. The most notable ones are his Saiyan Warrior costume, wherein he can fire off huge blasts of ki at great cost to himself. Also, his jet-black Ninja Gaiden style costume where his ninja powers are much more prevalent.
He's hentai. Not Thief hentai, but solidly hentai. He hates dickgirls and yaoi, is indifferent to hardcore/straight hentai and prefers yuri. He hates fanboy Japanese with a passion and will hurt whoever uses it in his presence. He's a writer, and a book fiend, so he'll make intelligent grammar riffs, gripe about crappy plotting and remark on uneducated character-bashing/plot points. He's sarcastic. That's the only real way to describe him. He's sarcastic and clever.

Brandt Delacroix/Thief (Chimera): 
He is Brandt Lazarus Delacroix, a painfully shy Catholic orphan of gentle demeanor and unrealistically optimistic world view. Yet he was chosen by an Evil Gov'mint Projekt to recieve bizarre genetic and surgical alterations that have crafted him into a psychic of immense power... able to warp reality, gaze through the walls of existance and even pass through them with concious effort. Unfortunately it cost him his sanity. Within this delicate, blue-eyed, ebon-haired, very short, pretty boy of fifteen is the mind of a murderous sexual predator who goes by the name of Thief.
Brandt's riffing style is odd... he's a bit of an obsessive compulsive, so he tries to get EVERY repeating oddity in the fic. Coupled with serious fanboy leanings for any 'nerdy' fantasy/sci-fi books, songs, animes, musicals, and movies, he tends to mention seriously obscure, specific qoutes from them. Further, he tends to make insane, obscure (sometimes clever) puns and non-jokes, and can undergo insane logic riffs, possibly due to 'side effects' of his MPD. Sometimes he 'projects' riffs of people he misses from other fics. Think of Felix from the Odd Couple, Jeremy from Sports Night, etc.
Thief's riffing is more straightforward. Thief is vicious and punishes percieved lack of fic-quality (quality in this case meaning lots of sweaty sex and violence) with wild sarcasm, angry dark riffs, and the worst perversions imaginable. Most of his fellow riffers are easy targets too, which he attacks without conscience. Extreme inanity or boredom from the fic can cause Thief to go on a murderous rampage. For some reason nobody wants to think about too much, Thief suffers from Redhairedalibiphobia, which is the fear of Shirley Temple or anything implying her.
Since his incarceration in a series of Quasispace theaters, Brandt has formed several alliances and friendships. Psychics do that, you know. He likes Dragomorph and trusts Cosmos, among others. Also he seems to have bonded well with t.ogre... though t. better have a damn good explaination for torturing Brandt in ep 102 when they meet next!
Thief has also formed alliances and friendships. He has a great deal of affection for SDR and liked Kaophyre in her evil form. Also for some reason he sometimes seems to have a Bart/Milhouse style relationship with Krinn, maybe because he promised he'd let Krinn play the cop from Reservoir Dogs.
Currently Brandt/Thief is wearing a tattered, blood-spattered formal shirt, sneakers, a plastic wrap-cum-tartan kilt, and a red silk cape (which is far too big for him). A small, plain silver crucifix hangs over his heart and his reading glasses are hooked into his waistband.
Brian Klem (The General):
Brian is from our world and was literally thrust into Dream City by a plot device. He's 5'6", 150 lbs and eleven years old. He wields a 'Gothic Bastard Sword' and drives a modified A-wing he calls 'Genesis.' He doesn't reveal much of his past, *coughmarysuecough* and earns a living by looting evil international corporations. Since videogames are pretty Marxist in this respect, business is good. ^_^
His living expenses are fairly small, as he has everything he needs right in his a-wing. Brian can usually be found there, either reading or playing videogames. He wears a tuxedo with black pants,sneakers,a black bow tie, white jacket, and a white undershirt with a Monty Python logo on on the left breast.
Brian is a three parts honorable, scholarly, and hentai-like. He's a pretty nice guy, (expecially compared to most of the people in Dream City) and he often goes out of his his way to help those in need (rich, poor, white, black, etc). This often leads him into conflict with people of a more violent nature such as Lance and t. ogre, and he will come to the defense of a hentai who's being attacked. (except Thief. Thief he'll attack) When he makes friends, he'll do all he can to protect them.
Being the intellectal type, Brian spends alot of time complaining about how things don't make since, and them explaing why. (He'll try to keep it short, though) Brian often makes a lot of "smart" jokes, and even his references can be full of historical figures. Brian has no qualms about making hentai riffs, but since he's a more of a romantic hentai, such riffs aren't as disurbing as most. Somehow, someway, he actually *likes* being in the theater. Of course, it's pretty easy to find a hentai fic to churn his insides.

Charandra (Mazoku):
Charandra found out when she was ten that she was the reincarnation of an insane fire priestess who was trying her damn best to become a goddess before she was defeated by a bunch of adventurers. This explains a lot about her personality. In terms of appearance, she's a 5'2" 13 year-old girl with brown hair in a pageboy cut. She's usually wearing loose jeans, leather boots with 3-inch heels, too much jewelry to count, and a white t-shirt with words that change depending on her mood. Think a modern-day Lina Inverse in terms of personality, but with an even more twisted sense of humor. She has more magic than she knows what to do with, but can't control it worth heck. So she can fireball you, but she might just set herself on fire, too. Or more likely, she'll set an alternate universe version of the person on fire. Her riffs are generally very obscure and/or video game-themed. Or, well, yaoi-themed, but only if someone else starts riffing that way first. She has a minor obsession with masks and their innate powers. Did I mention she twitches every time elves are brought up?
Cosmos: 
Cosmos is a twenty-something woman, about 5'10, with blue eyes and black hair. Her preferred outfit is a T-shirt and blue jeans, although her current pair is a fair bit shorter than she likes, courtesy of Thief. She usually has on a pair of sunglasses, even when in the darkened theater and has repeatedly acquired and reacquired a trenchcoat since she arrived in the theater. No special powers associated with the coat, other than it keeps her warm. She runs a small, not entirely successful bookstore called Wardenclyffe Tower in Dream City and still has her satchel from her uncompleted delivery run. The satchel appears to be connected to some sort of book-specific hammerspace, since she can pull a book for any occasion from it. This may or may not be related to her unconscious and uncontrollable ability to warp reality; the results of which have occasionally been useful but generally tend to be simply ironic. She wields a paintball gun with a full color assortment and tends to go after grammar errors, continuity flaws, affronts to established canon and OOC behavior. She has a distinctly dark streak in her humor that's been getting darker since she arrived in the theater. While she isn't actually a prude, the company she's been keeping and some of the fics she's been forced to watch have put her a bit on edge.
Cosmos is sensitive to the energies created by dimensional portals and accidently stumbled into Quasispace when her curiosity got the better of her and prompted her to enter the area around a malfunctioning TTD. She's generally a logical, forgiving person and that fact has prevented her from holding a grudge against Kao (since Kao was under the influence of evil soda) or t.ogre (given his face turn). Robbie seems to be a different matter, since he's neither redeemed himself nor given her a good reason for forcing her to watch bad fanfiction. She'll probably get tired of clobbering him... eventually. Otherwise, she's grimly determined to get herself and her fellow riffers out of this place.

DarkHorse Pterid:
Diminutive, and mildly cute, scaly winged/betailed entity with a middle-class British accent and fashion sense (if 'sense' is the word) extending to poor imitations of '60s Star Trek gear and a Dave Gilmour-esque trench. DarkHorse has plans (which he can't talk about) so he has to earn money (for that thing he can't talk about) to hire some people for (you get the idea). That's about all anyone's been able to get out of him. Worshipper of prog rock icons, with a dry and cynical nature, he'll milk any joke dry, sick or otherwise.

David Corrigan (Callahan):
David is a Caucasian male, with blond hair, brown eyes, and a hooked nose. He stands 5'9" and weighs around the area of 167 pounds. He works as a postman for the IDLPS, the Inter-Dimensional Letter and Parcel Service. Hailing for a relatively unknown dimension, his bodily proportions always seem slightly out of sync with his surroundings: his hair is just a little too blond, his mouth is a little too wide, and his teeth have a slight askew geometry. He is a great fan of fight scenes and doesn't care quite so much about plot, but will drive illogical minutiae into the ground. He dresses in the normal IDLPS uniform, which consists of a gray button down, a white tie, white khaki pants, black penny loafers, white gloves, and a baseball cap bearing the IDLPS logo. He carries with him several bizarre and at first glance useless weapons, including Lovecraftian cathode tubes, a ball of flubber, and a collection of KISS action figures. Last but not least, he's a dendrophiliac and an obsessive fan of Luna Sea.

Demonicuss Krinn:
(Old, dead) Demonicuss Krinn: A demon-blooded human (demonling, for short), he stands 5'7", with brown hair, blue eyes, wears glasses with a slight blue tint, and prefers to wear his "Spooky Dracula Getup", consisting of black pants, white shirt, and black cape. He's believed to be basically unkillable and can mutate himself a la The Thing. In fact his control over his cellular structure is near perfect, able to come back from insane damage in a short time. Regrettably, being in the theater pushes his nigh-immortality to the limits, as he gets hurt. A lot. And often. Badly. Most of the time by the other riffers and the Mads he's annoyed someway, somehow. Sadly, while his body can regenerate from any injury almost instantly, his clothing takes a lot longer to reform, occasionally resulting in the embarrassing "Naked Krinn". Personality wise, he's your typical jackass/wiseman/joker, with a highly varied riffing style. Or rather was, as apparently he couldn't deal with simultaneously getting eaten by a griffin, caught in a supernova, and captured by a pissed off tentacled monster with a grudge. Was mourned by Brandt and the gang in Ep. 103 in a most appropriate (and slightly embarrassing) manner.

Nnirk Ssucinomed: Looking a lot like Krinn, only dressed in a stylish black suit, red silk shirt, and black cape. Nnirk claims to be the son of a crackwhore who turned to diabolism and demon summoning to rise to power. Upon finding his world's equivalent to Torture Theater, a quick scry revealed to him the Quasi-Gang, and he decided that traveling the Multiverse to torture them would be an interesting thing to do. Actually, Nnirk is the "Evil Side" of Demonicuss Krinn, formed by the remnants of the digested remains that Virgil excreted. Nnirk is evil because he was created out of griffin shit, although he isn't telling anyone that. Riffwise, Nnirk is darkly sarcastic, intellectual, and hentai, often keeping an eye towards the ladies.

Good Krinn: While all that was evil (or at least really annoying) went into Nnirk, all that was good went into the bloodstains on Brandt's shirt. Absorbing the general goodness that seems to radiate from Brandt, the result was a reanimated 'Good' Krinn, who looks like Krinn clad in white. Since he came into being as a result of Brandt's inherent niceness (and let's be grateful that Thief had no part of this), Good Krinn is so sweet and cute and loveable and kind and goddamn wonderful that even Brandt gets a little annoyed with him. As being good, Good Krinn
only makes 'clean riffs' along with Brandt, and scolds the other riffers when they get perverted or sick.

(New, not dead) Demonicuss Krinn: Much the same as the old Krinn, except the riffers are now fairly certain he's entirely unkillable. Krinn has gone through an incredible amount of punishment, from car accidents, to decapitations, to exposure in radioactive gas, to a stint in the Blood War, to surviving an incident involving a hungry griffin, an exploding space station caught in a supernova and a pissed off tentacled demon, to being split into his Good and Evil halves, and always bounces back good as new. Sadly, he still hasn't found clothing as durable as he is, but he's comfortable with his body, so it's all good (at least as far as he's concerned, others may hold different opinions). Personality wise, he's your typical jackass/wiseman/joker, with a highly varied riffing style.

Dragomorph:
A bipedal female rabbit with dragon wings and a tail. Stands about three feet tall and wears only a t-shirt with the words "Bunny Power" on it, but that's okay because, in typical cartoon fashion, she's not anatomically correct anyway. She arrived in Dream City to go into show business, but decided that being a freelancer jack-of-all-trades was infinitely preferable to fluffy bunny cartoons and weird fetish pornos. Dragomorph has the potential for finding logic in literally everything, even though in the course of finding said logic it defies conventional sense. She specializes in most riffs, but tends to enjoy warping characters and making loads of Monty Python and video game related jokes, and really sucks at perverted riffs. She's also very sensitive about her height and self-worth and will either FRY anybody who makes fun of her with her fire breath or will burst into tears. Being related to rabbits, she is quite fluent in the language of "Wuffle."
Dragomorph was lured into Quasispace under the false pretense that she would at last be auditioning for a serious role. She has taken something of a shining to Brandt, yet for the most part remains indifferent to Thief thus far. She tends to unintentionally drive Cosmos and Robbie crazy with her logic, though (particularly Cosmos).

eonsinger:
He's tall and fairly slight of build, with brown hair and eyes. Tends to wear a bright blue t-shirt over a dark red turtleneck, and long black cargo pants with huge pockets, the end of a pyrophone sticking out of one. Wields a microphone with threatening spikes, attached to a length of audio wire. A freelance musician who's just moved to Dream City from a sleepy town in Vermont, and is having poor luck looking for gigs. Living in the Midway ghetto, he's had to learn Yang style T'ai Chi to defend himself, mixed with his own unique improbable musical nonsense. He has a screwed-up sense of humor, tends to make rather crude jokes, horrible puns, write filk and bad poetry, and sing at odd moments. As one of the people who initiated the disaster in episode 101, he tends to suffer from considerable resentment from the other riffers.

Ice Fenix:
A ball of combustion, hentai to the fifth power. He lives in Dream City with his roommate, slacker, and pot smoking award winner Mormon and Mormon's pet goat, Nagahide. An initiate member of the MMKult, Ice is something of a skeptic in the group.

Jake Elias (Penfold):
A young man in his early to mid 20's. 5'10" with an average build, brown hair and blue eyes. Keeps two runestones tied around his left wrist, and a couple in a belt pouch. Usually has a Bowie knife with him. As far as anyone can tell, his hometown can change locations. Jake is GURPS-style magic user and can use Rune Magic, a few Healing and Information spells, and more cantrips than can possibly be healthy, especially if he's forced to come up with quick rhymes.
Jake uses logic and grammer riffs, modified by his magical-town-not-on-any-map-naivete. May make a few obscure references, but his knowledge of recent pop culture is nonexistent. He is just as well informed about the news of the day as anyone else, though. Jake usually tolerates hentai, but he's freaked out by S&M and angered by rapefics. The more violent the scene, the more pronounced his reaction becomes in either case.

Kenneth/K (idiotbox):
A gawky Cantonese Yorkshireman with black hair who, though its difficult to tell, appears to be in his late teens/early twenties. Usually wears faded black jeans, plain mono t-shirts and capped boots. K is a T-1000 and is well versed in RPG science and lore. Not very good at defending himself, mind.
K, as befits a Hull man, has a classic Northern sense of humour with a misanthropic black streak, although in the theatre, he's pretty much a jack of all riffs. He tends to swing towards obscure music (and we're not just talking one-hit wonders here) and sci-fi fantasy e.g. RPGs, southern gothic, Philip K Dick and the like. Its fortunate that he's highly durable as he often says and does things which get him punked thoroughly. Also behaves like Papa Lazarou around women.

Kaophyre Tamadashi Serai:
A dark-haired, pale, sunglass-wearing, 5'9" 15 year old girl with a penchant for swords, Mountain Dew, and Canadian boys. Wears a lot of leather and jeans, with a hammerspace-capable jacket. Has a six foot bamboo staff and oversized silver finish Glock 19s, in addition to impressive Tae Kwon Do-based martial arts skills. Her riffs tend towards sarcasm, dark humor, mad hentai-ness, song referencing; Geek humor is far from unheard of from her. Despite her hentai nature she's frequently known to defend women's rights in the Theater and take offense at sexist commentary, which is all too common. She also has a full-blown mental and physical addiction to Canadian Smarties (to go with her addiction of Canadian boys) and is a devoted member of the MMKult.
Lainer:
Lainer stands just under six feet tall with naturally blue hair tied back into a pony tail. His usual attire (i.e. the only thing he would ever wear even under threats of death and/or being forced to beat Yokosuka Wars) is a dark blue sweater, day-glo neon green slacks and trench coat, and off-white dress shoes. His coat itself is of some interest as it is one of those nifty reality warping models. Unfortunatly it never works correctly and typically screws Lainer over by giving him the same physics as a video game character (Instantly killing him if he touches mushrooms, forcing him to speak in textboxes, turning two dimensional, and the like). His coat also has a hammerspace feature, but it's just as screwy; usually dispensing completely useless items that look like they came from either KB Toys backstock or a highway gift shop. This doesn't bother Lainer much, but anyone else that tries to use it will pull out something that is a twisted version of what they wanted (For example, someone trying to pull a .45 Colt Magnum out will instead pull out Lando Calrissian wearing a Tom Selleck mask.).
Lainer spent most of his pre-quasispace time being bumped from temp job to temp job. He was originaly paid to be the Mad in ep 103, but the plan backfired and he ended up half naked and trapped in a cage for most of the episode. After that incident he has been getting progressivly... "unhinged".
Lainer is, more or less, a parody of all those "I've got a trench coat! I am so bad ass!" types that have polluted pop culture since the eighties. Lainer doesn't really have any problem with being in the theater, and will only become mad at a fic if it screws up a pop referance or something else equily trite. He will typically referance american cartoons of the past thrity years, daytime tv, and video games. He is indiffernt to hentai riffs, although he would very rarely make one himself, and is genuenly aggrivated by logic and sense riffs. He also has a habit of standing up for something that everyone else hates. Mainly because it's *really* annoying.

Lance Walker (Shade):
A 5'11 fox-man from the Star Fox node, who ended up in Dream City because of a freak accident while trying to avoid a few bounty hunters that were after him for undisclosed reasons. His eyes are dark green, and he's usually dressed in a black shirt with a white stripe around the collar, a green flight jacket, green gloves, black jeans just loose enough not to hinder his movement, and grey steel boots. He makes his living as a mercenary/assassin, and has been doing quite well despite competition from his 'friendly rival', Kaophyre. Past hardships in his life have left him with a rather biter attitide towards everything in general, although he rarely appears angry, normally going into an eerily calm and detached state when truly enraged, where he'll usually calmly, almost casually dismember you beyond recognition. Past problems have also left him with a few... issues. Such as the fact that whenever he hears a pun he goes into an insane, mindless, homocidal Riot-of-The-Blood-like rage, which'll go on until the offending punner is either dead, or has 'momentarily' escaped his wrath. This little problem has also lead to him vowing to kill t. ogre at any cost for a truely unforgivable pun.
He first became involved with Quasispace while hunting down t. ogre, when he followed him into Torture Theater, and was subsequently captured by Searcher. During his stay he built up grudges against almost everyone else there, especcially t. ogre and Brandt. He has since dissapeared since the first accidental teleportation. Whereever he is, odds are that he's biding his time, waiting for another chance to take t. ogre's life, and end his 'life's mission'. You can also be assured that he's gone quite mad. Well, moreso then usual...
His riffing style mostly consists of (really) dark, sarcastic, and bitter riffs, along with the occasional preverted one. Since ep 101, his mind, and thus his logic have been warped slightly, so that may also have an effect on his riffs in the theater.

Max:
Not much is know about but we do know that he:
-is an anime fanboy. Makes anime riffs, and uses Otakuspeak.
-is an extremely devoted Rei Ayanami fanboy.
-carries a bar clamp as a pseudo-weapon. Is utterly inept with any other weapon.
-believes Oniko is literally EVA's Shinji Ikari.
-will unabashedly make logic and grammar nitpicks.
-hates OOC.
-doesn't care for/about hentai riffs.

Oniko Hakubi:
For all intents and purposes, Oniko looks like an 18 to 25-year old Shinji Ikari with Angel's haircut, with the stray locks of hair pulled behind his ears. Despite this, he still manages to look halfway masculine. His outfit of choice involves blue jeans, a gray T-shirt with a random saying or slogan, sneakers, a black UAC baseball cap and either a hooded black jacket or a denim jacket. Oniko is pretty immature for his indeterminate age, and as such, his riffing tends to veer into the strange, obscure, silly and/or perverted, with a heavy leaning towards yuri and shoujo-ai; but as Lainer once put it: "He's not a pervert, he just does it for the attention." Ironically, Oniko's probably one of the bigger feminists in Quasispace. Other quirks include rampant Fourth Wall-breaking, massive over-selling, an active role in the MMKult (he's an elder member), a near-unlimited supply of Shiranui brand fans, a burning hatred of Xenogears and its fans and his "family" of nubile ninja girls that follow him around for no good reason.

Robert Kelly (Robbie):
A teenager, about six foot two inches tall, with messy black hair and glasses. Usually wears a baggy black t-shirt, black jeans and black hiking boots. He's slightly overweight, but he's rapidly losing the fat, especially with what he's currently going through.
His riffing stlye is slightly laconic and deadpan, usually referencing music, anime and manga, literary references and comics. He doesn't mind hentai riffs unless they're really sick, and doesn't stand for dark riffs.
He used to own a G-Con 2, but t.ogre took that in Episode 102 just before the space station blew, when he was coaxed into helping him operate the Torture Theater. Robbie still has Bokken no Kusanagi, and isn't afraid to use it, even though he doesn't know it's actually a "Iai-To" samurai sword, the Bokken secretly housing a 19 inch katakana blade.
He was with the Quasispacers at the start, having answered a job with Brandt in Dream City to warm the seats of some antique chairs. then he ended up helping t.ogre work a Torture Theater in the Earth's orbit, before finding himself inside a smoky bar.

S.D. Ryukage:
Short for 'Shadow Dragon', but more commonly known as SDR (Shady to her friends), she's a half-drow/half-dragon - essentially, her natural form is a dark-skinned and dark-haired elf with dragon wings - of about...well, 14 years old at the moment, though she looks closer to, say, 20. Knows Ice Fenix, is a veteran MiSTer (with Mystery Octagon Theater and ImproFicRoast) and sidekick-Mad (with the MMK.) She's somewhere between 5'6" and 5'10", with black hair to mid-back, dark skin, pointy elf-ears, violet eyes, and black dragon-wings. She has magic, and carries around a tachi called the Masamune. (Not *that* Masamune, another one.) Tendency to make slash jokes, dark jokes, and quotes. Occasionally changes into a random anime/manga/video game/book character to make a riff. She tends to only hold it for at most three riffs (or three paragraphs of a skit), but during that time, for all intents and purposes, she /is/ that person. (Common characters would include the ones in her moveslist and Yao-chan, who's essentially SDR's Yaoi Mistress of the Hentai Dojo side come out to play. Feel free to be as overblown with this as you like, as long as she doesn't dissolve into squealing-preteen-crappy-typist-Mary-Sueist-yaoi-fangirl. ^^) After a single session in Quasispace, she's developed something approaching an alliance with Oniko, and an unholy alliance of evil hentai with Thief (she wears her Thief Fan Club badge with /pride/!) although the relationship is a rocky one. Warped sense of humor. Has several people renting out space in her head. Gets homicidal at the mention of Looney Tunes. You *don't* want to know why.
Sailor M (Meagan):
This happy-go-lucky, looney senshi comes from an alternate universe where Sailor Senshi are numerous enough to form a whole international network. Although it should be pointed out that they are in fact *not* all like M. Her ability to wander between dimentions if she's not paying attention (ie. most of the time) causes most chagrin since her home universe doesn't have that technology yet. They're working on it though, mostly because they can't bear to be represented in the Multiverse by the most insane (according to about 80% of tests) inhabitant.
M's riffing style will consist largely of strings of exclamations, loosely going from the subject matter to either: "Bishie!!!", "Beatles!!!", "Kawaii!!" or "giant flying purple weasels!!!". Also refs to Beatles songs, kid's Anime, pointing out cute guys in the fic (wether or not there are any guys at all in said fic), and, just when you least expect it, a happy but coherent and logical rant about why something like *that* could never, ever happen.

Searcher (Thomas Wilde):
Not a MiSTer, but a Mad. He dresses in white and gray Armani, wielding a quarterstaff. He's the evil twin of the well-known Wanderer. If Wanderer's an anti-hero, he's an anti-villain, sort of the way Lex Luthor or Dr. Doom can be very nice, upstanding citizens as long as everything is going their way. Skilled in the use of Telekidnapping Retrieval Systems (TKRS) and Temporal Telemetry Destabilizers (TTD), he has a suspicious degree of skill and knowledge about how to be a Mad Scientist, and most resources he might require are a single phone call away. Also a highly skilled lurker. His exact whereabouts are unknown since Ep. 101, but he appears to still be pursuing the riffers as of Ep. 103.

Sherlock:
A 5'11', 170-pound, 37-Earth-year old feliomorph (for lack of a better word) from the planet Arusia III. He has thick fur, pointed ears on the top of his head, a human-esque face, a long tail with a tuft at the end, sharp teeth and claws, and the build of a man. Sherlock hs the ability to read a human's mind (and communicate with animals), but usually chooses to let everyone keep their privacy. He is a master of a martial arts that uses Ice Magic. The magic can be reflected back at him with mirrors and becomes weak with prolonged use. He can be distracted by any type of raw meat. In the light of the full moon, he turns into a savage, bloodthirsty beast which can be soothed and controlled using music.
He tends to make fun of stupid jokes, acronyms, mocks Pop Stars blatantly, rip up the screen ferociously if Brittany Spears is ever mentioned in a story, and makes fun of any abbreviations present. He is obsessed with certain anime, and if they're ever used in a fanfic, he goes into a temporary rage, as they are being defiled. Does not intentionally make hentai riffs. Tries to make a pun or wisecrack every once in a while, but is not prone to them.
t.ogre:
A 6'5", 300 pound man with long auburn hair and a red goatee with grey bits, who if we didn't know better might seem a relative of Kevin Nash. Formerly was seen wearing outlandish colored t-shirts (like neon orange), denim overalls and Doc Martens. At the end of Episode 102, t.ogre had a (tentacle-fluid splattered) white cape with the holy Anti-Hentai symbol emblazoned in the center of it. Since his disappearance at the end of Episode 102, apparently has made a face turn and changed his gimmick, now wearing the Anti-Hentai cape, dark t-shirts, roll-down boots and a kilt. His riff style is pretty open, with an affinity for intellectual riffing and puns, and an extreme dislike of Jericho and Rock-based bits. Will make jokes about himself wearing a skirt, but will smack anyone else who does. Thus far, has no compunction about clobbering any other character with a steel chair... except Brandt, for whom he seems to have developed a strange anti-hentai nearing-middle-age single masculine male paternal instinct. As well, he still doesn't exactly understand why Lance wants to kill him. 

Viper the Hedgehog:
An out-of-control, wacky, offensive, loud, cheery, and completely insane fifteen year old red hedgehog, standing at 4'5". Wearing nothing but a pair of black and white 'Y2Sonic' style sneakers and white gloves, he has dark-blue eyes, and fashionable red quills to boot. Viper is one of those "This-thing-is-fucking-terrible-but-I'm-already-too-insane-to-care-WAI!" type riffers. Apart from being a hedgehog, he does have *one* other peculiar ability: he is able to morph into any character that appeared on any Sega-made system, as well as pull any object from them. Hence the term 'Segamorph.' Can't do many Dreamcast ones, for some reason. This power has never been used to cause any harm. Instead, it's usually used to create hilarity, extreme annoyance, or just to cure boredom streaks...but you never know. His riffs are all over the chart, including but not limited to: puns, game logic riffs, smartass comments, song excerpts, and perverted riffs. Liked by a few fellow riffers, confusing or annoying to the rest. Large fan of the MMK, yet for some reason unknown, refuses to join the MMKult. Highly attached to 7-Up. Usually can be found around Darkhorse, Krinn, Oniko, or Brandt.

Zandar Randell:
A slim man in his early twenties, Zandar is most easily distinguished by his white and metallic body armour. A remnant of a long-destroyed deep-space utopia from THE FUTURE, he's currently embroiled in yet another war...except when he gets yanked into Quasispace. A recalcitrant molecular constructor and the ability to (probably) cheat death make up somewhat for the fact that he's never actually been trained in combat. Calm is what he does best; he'll draw impossible conclusions from the most mind-bending logic or hentai scenes, as long as it's in the fic and not in the theatre. He also likes to make old computer game and RPG references, and isn't averse to the occasional pun.
Season Two

OUR VILLIANS

Esurient Mammon Penumbra, Esq.
AKA Mr P, AKA "Junior"
Esurient is the embodiment of need in the human soul, the anti-Nirvana. As such he often appears as a figure made of shadow. He runs a megacorporation named UVULA, the culimination of souless Capitalism gone mad.
Esurient also likes to pretend to be Cosmos' perfect man, a charming and handsome bloke named Walden, for reasons unknown.

Willias Meurte
Perhaps the sanest person on the cast despite being literally unkillable (or more accurately he refuses to stay dead once killed), Meurte is Esurient's unforunate right hand man. He seems not to enjoy his job most of the time.

Professor Bruxridge
His true name is unknown, the cast usually refers to him as Bruxridge simply for convenience. Bruxridge is a very prolific method actor who methodizes to such an extreme that he can take on whatever skills he needs, and so fills an astronomical number of positions in Esurient's organization.

Phil
The Phils. There's uncountable Phils, all plain-looking balding men in overalls and checkered shirts. They do maintenance, all the while searching for The One.

THE LOST
These are presented here simply in case they're referred to, and won't show up again unless old authors resurface.

t.ogre
A good and decent man, t. was a wrestler before all this started. He protected the just and the innocent to the end, and was looked up to by the "survivors", but was lost in the Quasispace.

Krinn/Nnirk
A demonling but despite that a decent creature, bonded with Brandt. Krinn was just pulling his two ying-yang halves together when he fell into Quasispace.

DHP
Darkhorse Petrid seemingly escaped on a jetpack when things were going bad. Lucky duck.

Lance
A man with a serious hate-on for t. and Brandt, who was willing to make a Faustian deal with Esurient in order to hurt them (and to preserve his own life). He, too, disappeared into Quasispace.

UNIT001, AKA the Chickentank
An evil AI construct housed in a heavily modified M1A1 Abrams tank Thief drew from an alternate dimension, UNIT001's indestructable hull was used as a bludgeoning weapon against UVULA headquarters. At faster than lightspeed. We're pretty sure he's dead.

The Magical Wrench Fairy
Missing, presumed unbelieved in.

S.D. Ryukage
Thief and Ryukage had a whirlwind romance, that lead to a whirlwind betrayal. Thief nearly gave his life to protect her from UVULA killers, and she may be the one person he wishes he could see again.

TIMECOPS
The one apparent force for law and order in the many universes joined by the glue of quasispace, the TIMECOPS are unfortunately also deeply corrupt (they are financed by UVULA), and more unfortunately yet, are all basically stone-stupid fanservice ladies. The three most troublesome members, Kate, Jaclyn, and Farrah were all lost to the Quasispace.

The Others
Some of them our heroes loved, some of them they hated. There were a great number of them and they all deserved their time in the spotlight, and they will be missed.

THE HEROES

Cosmos
A single woman in her mid-20s who ran a store for rare books back home, she was unceremoniously kidnapped for usage in hideous fic experiments. She's usually sensible and reasonable, but each fic has further eroded her patience and her goodwill, leaving her with a considerable temper. Exacerbating this is a strange and surreal power she has neither control over or knowledge of. Whenever she's in dire need of a specific object, that object has a habit of conveniently being at hand.
RIFFING STYLE: Grammarical, literary

Brandt Delacroix, AKA Thief
Brandt Delacroix is a teenaged, formerly kept at a Catholic orphanage. His is (was) a gentle soul, caring and polite, sexually repressed and with a strong nerd streak. His gentle soul matched by a whisp-thin frame and delicate features. However, a myserious agent appeared at the orphanage and recruited him for a program involving powerful drugs and cranial surgery, altering the way his brain works. This program supercharged his psychic abilities to near godlike proportions, but not without side-effects. He now has Dissassociative Identity Disorder, a split-personality. His other half is Thief, a crazed sexually charged Charles Manson fan. He can switch between them with virtually no warning, and has no knowledge of his "better half".
RIFFING STYLE: Nerdy and obscure and a bit OC/angry and pervy. Both halves love to sing.

Malcolm Weinecke Likander (MAL in scriptform)
Sixteen years old, tall, blonde, Malcolm was kidnapped by Esurient out of a sense of self-preservation. A child megagenius who graduated from M.I.T. before the age of ten, Malcolm's IQ is so far off the charts that, like, the charts... don't... know anything about it. A phenom who can understand any magic or technology or combination thereof to which he's exposed, he tries as much as he can to be nice to the normal people around him, even if they're all barely evolved chimps to him. Or so he sometimes thinks. His pride has gotten him into this situation and he seems convinced it'll get him back out. In the meantime he tries, TRIES, to keep his cool during fics which he could've torn to shreds when he was three years old.
RIFFING STYLE: Logic, internal inconsistancies, factual, trying not to loose his sanity (what of it he possesses), roots for the villian every time

Rebecca Ananke
In her early twenties, Rebecca (BECCA in the scriptform) is a mysterious and... strange woman with little to no ability to explain just how she arrived in the theater, or what's going on. She seems to have the mild and personality of a very young child... if, admittedly, a fairly well-behaved one. Her talent 'back in the world" was painting and drawing, something she does compusively. With or on anything at hand. It helps her to express herself. She spookily can speak in emoticons, a power perhaps linked to her artistic talents. She's often recruited by the Mads and Phils for small chores due to her overly helpful nature.
RIFFING STYLE: Incomprehension sprinkled with startling wisdom, offbeat lunacy and nonsequitors, "the wildcard riffer".

Zayn Rudhale
Another twenty-something, this is a man who is best described as attractively nondescript. He is an actor with a prolific career as a non-speaking extra. Movies, TV, video games, comic books- he's been in them all, milling around in the background, waiting for the bus, eating dinner, etc. He wound up in the theater after answering a truly unfortunate ad for extras at a UVULA company party.
RIFFING STYLE: He will often point out his roles in a fic and share behind the scenes gossip. Specializes in pop culture riffs.